Chapter 10: The Portal at Le Dôme Discotheque. Enter Remiel.

I am finally back at my apartment after a long 24-hour romp with Kate and Keren, and I need an intravenous infusion of vitamins, minerals, and electrolytes to fully recover from our raucous love festival. The bond of affection and the soul-tie between us was so powerful, complete, and perfect, that I made a vow to myself on this day, Monday the 29th of August 1994, that I would never again indulge in a folie à trois. My cup of desire is full; my hunger for conquest was subdued, and my allocation of sexual exploration has been fulfilled. 

The summer of 1994 gifted me with several pairings of women that were the epitome of raucous, unhindered, licentious self-indulgence. Geneviève, a lovely surprise gift from Madame Élise, was the first ‘third-person’ who induced this Bacchic triumvirate of three lovely souls. Madame Élise dispatched Geneviève with Claudia one fine evening in July, and this surprise initial encounter led to more inquisitiveness that was overwhelming, leading to many more encounters in a short period.

The next pairing of two women was intentional, with Kate and Clarice on two separate contiguous evenings during the same weekend, which was pure polyamorous indulgence driven by internal eroticism and a hedonistic spirit of decadence hearkening back to the zeitgeist of ancient Babylon. Immediately after the Kate and Clarice weekend affair came a surprise pairing of Kate and Claudia by a synchronistic chance meeting at the Argo bookstore, the morning after Kate and I left Clarice’s apartment while walking home. 

After the three of us met, we got together for dinner that evening, and an overnight encounter ensued that was lovely, highly erotic, and memorable. I so much enjoyed my time with Kate and Claudia, and this memory still simmers in my mind and will never leave me. A couple of weeks later, Madame Élise and I went away on a weekend trip to a countryside resort and met a mysterious woman named Enheduanna and another surprise guest in our suite that left me in total ontological shock.

The final love ritual between Kate, Keren, and me was the capstone of folie à trois love affairs and would remain so for the rest of my life as I vowed to never subject myself to such opulent decadence again. I reached a physical, moral, and spiritual limit towards the end of my encounter with Kate and Keren that was in part because of the expansion of my consciousness by the psychedelic-pharmakia-induced euphoria of the honey mixture that was used in our love affair. 

Keren, being a talented chemist and avatar of Aphrodite, was adept at ritual lovemaking, and she changed my worldview and outlook on life forever. The love and physical healing that were gifted to me during the summer of 1994 exorcised the spirit of lust and desire that had been plaguing me since I was three years old. A spell and a Hermetic seal that were placed upon me by my birth-mother, who was skilled in this area of divination, were fractured.

The intensity of the eroticism combined with the love, beauty, and affection afforded by all of my partners, but especially Kate and Keren, forever repelled the horde of spirits that was weighing me down once the seal and the spell were shattered. I had a realization that it was time to refuse the compulsive desire for sexual healing and gratification of my fleshly vessel. My conscious will took hold of the reins of power after my awareness was freed from its opaque veil, allowing me to come to my senses and put a damper on this licentious behavior and tame this deadly innate drive to a manageable state from this day forward. 

The tight connection between the addictive dopamine loop in my nervous system and the cycle of orgasmic achievement induced my conscious awareness to a complex new idea that turned out to be a fundamental change in my life. I realized I was trauma-bonded to the behavior of seeking gratification, adulation, and validation through sexual conquest and overindulgence in actions that truly require thoughtful modulation, control, and supreme reverence.

My human container, which most people call a body, has emotional limitations and innate boundaries that I must delineate, define, and maintain accordingly. Sharp curbs against overindulgence in behaviors that induce large amounts of hormones, neurotransmitters, and other potent endocrine and exocrine responses (e.g. the dopamine loop) can lead to addiction, affliction, suffering, and outright madness if not restrained by willful discipline, mindfulness, and mortification of the flesh. 

I specifically chose the term “folie à trois” instead of “ménage à trois” in my memoirs to define my triumvirate sexual encounters, because of the potential for madness that such indulgences can induce if not checked, but technically, both terms apply. I truly enjoyed myself immensely, and I worked feverishly to please my partners and treat them with reverence and love, but that gesture did not negate the feeling that I was treading on forbidden ground that was against the natural order and law of mankind.

I have learned recently that my body, brain, and nervous system record and temporarily store my life experiences in its vast microtubule network present in every cell and structure in the body. These microtubules contain EZ-water, which plays a role in information storage and processing before forwarding these memory trace information packets, in a complex biophysical pathway that involves a bidirectional quantum entanglement with my indigo-soul, which lives in an eleven dimensional domain outside of the space-time continuum as described in previous chapters. 

My human container can easily summon the spontaneous recall of memories as long as I remain consciously alert and aware of my ability to control their upwelling. I know exactly how to do so through an adscititious skillfulness that requires training and long years of practice. After careful reflection on my life experiences during the summer of 1994, I realized I must curb my sensual desires and begin doing so slowly, but with a definite resolve to resume a normal pattern of intimate relations with women.

I must now live with the sultry memories, feelings, thoughts, and physical imprints that were evoked by my participation in the love-soaked, highly erotic encounters described in my memoirs for the rest of my life. These memories are a heavy burden that warrants a mild post-traumatic stress response and subsequent anxiety from time-to-time. In the absence of love and the associated physical and emotional stimuli provided by a relationship with a lovely woman, mild emotional trauma occurs because of the withdrawal of touch, physical presence, affection, infatuation, and the intoxication that genuine burning desire between willing partners generates. 

Losing the pleasurable dopamine-inducing reinforcement of these behaviors, which is so powerfully addictive, adds a dimension of suffering that is akin to grieving and loss. There is a tremendous cost, both spiritual and physical, to the behavioral phenomena of high-intensity sexual relations that involve deep love, soul-ties, and genuine affection. Loving someone instantly means grief will follow, and sometimes people experience superimposed grief while they enjoy the love being given to them prior to its inevitable withdrawal and, loss. 

To grieve is to love, and to love means that we will grieve, and the two are the same if you think about it closely. My readers should know that I could not fully write my memoirs for many years because of the powerful feelings evoked by the conscious recall of the lovely summer of 1994 and everything that happened to me prior to that time in my life. I could only attempt to write this memoir because I was in a period of voluntary celibacy and abstinence from sexual relations. 

As of the year 2026, I will have completed eleven years of celibacy and fasting from the delicious delights offered by women and the subsequent innate biochemical addiction that follows such love-soaked encounters. This level of abstinence took decades of preparation and a slow tapering-off process prior to drawing this hard line of thinking, and this all began after my last romp with Kate and Keren, ending the threesomes during the summer of 1994.

In 1991, I began my journey in Christianity thanks to a lovely woman named Teresa, whom I met while working at a national employment firm as an IT consultant in Dallas. She gave me a Bible and introduced me to the Book of John and in August 1991, while sitting in a computer room alone, I outwardly declared that, “Father God I believe you when you say that I should accept your son Jesus, and I accept Him as you have said and will follow Him.” A spirit, the Holy Spirit, immediately took me over, and this began my long journey of being pruned and whittled down to a bare stump to be rebuilt later on, some two decades in the future.